Cognitive Suicide

You were a flash of light across a sky of total dark. You saw their shocked and gaping jaws then it all returned to black. There was a brief surge of panic, their eyes pressed tight. You brought a swarm of confusion to their bleak but simple lives. Cognitive suicide. Insular, pathetic minds try to cut you off at the knees so they won’t be left behind. If everything is bland and unambiguous, maybe they can understand how they fit into this place. Every time they fail they seek a victim for their spite. Some dismal need to crush someone beneath their feet. All their acrid words can’t ease their wounded hearts. Despite their claims they have no maps, no keys to any gates. Cognitive suicide. Insecure, regressive minds try to cut you off at the knees so they won’t be left behind. Petrified, frozen to imaginary times. Pay no mind, I hope they pass you by. Live your life and don’t apologize to the cowards of this world, they’re a waste of time. Everything’s in between. Are they terrified of unobscured and brilliant colours? Perhaps you cracked the door to their own forbidden worlds. Everything’s in between.

This song is dedicated to Caster Simenya, a middle-distance runner who was subjected to a public and humiliating “gender verification” after winning the 800 metre World Championships in 2009; and Eudy Simelane, a footballer on the South African women’s national team who was beaten, raped and murdered as a “correction” for being a lesbian and LGBT activist. While Eudy’s life was tragically cut short, Caster perservered and continues to compete in track at the highest level. “Coward” here refers to those who are afraid to think, learn and look critically at themselves, not those who may hesitate, are afraid, or are too physically weak to “fight” in the traditional sense.

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